Prayer for the Discouraged Heart

Discouragement is something I struggle with consistently, yet I'm often surprised at how one piece of bad news or a disappointing interaction can drag me down so quickly. 

A little over a week ago I had the worst migraine headache I've ever experienced. I'm not sure what triggered it, but it was awful and I ended up having to spend almost the entire day in bed. Yuck.

A few days later, as I was still recovering, we got very disappointing news about an adoption situation our profile was supposed to be presented to. The details aren't important, but the information we received meant we wouldn't be presenting to that situation at all. Jason and I were both extremely disappointed. Between my lingering post-migraine headache and that emotional blow, I've pretty much been in a funk for the last week or so because of my discouragement. I've really been wondering how much longer we have to wait to become parents, fearing that it will never happen.

What about you?

Maybe you’re grappling with discouragement today too. You want to be content, but you’re filled with worries that your hopes will be dashed or your needs will not be met.

We become fearful and pessimistic when life doesn’t go as we’d hoped or planned. We forget God’s past faithfulness and lose sight of the hope we have in Him for the future.

You and I, we have to begin to view the world through a lens of gratitude instead of dissatisfaction. Using God’s Word as a template, we can ask the Holy Spirit to show us that God has cared for us perfectly in the past, and will faithfully continue to meet our needs for all time.

If you’re struggling with discontentment today, won’t you join me in asking God to help us find our satisfaction in Him, and thanking Him for faithful provision?

Today, I’m using Lamentations 3:-22-24 as a template for prayer and praise in the midst of discouragement:

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
   his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
   great is your faithfulness.
“The Lord is my portion,” says my soul,
   “therefore I will hope in him.”

Precious Lord, we thank you for your unceasing love and your unending mercies. Help us to remember them when we are tempted to despair. Remind us of your past kindness to us so that our hearts may be filled with gratitude and hope instead of dissatisfaction and fear.

We are overwhelmed by your infinite grace: how amazing that we can never exhaust it! Because of Christ, we, who are faithless and fickle, can become your children! We have nothing to offer you, yet you still provide for us with abundance!  We are forgiven and set free from sin, not because of our good works, but only because of your mercy! Because you, and you alone, are our portion, we have hope for the future.

We praise you with thanks!

Help us to treasure truth when discouragement creeps into our hearts. Open our eyes to your faithful love and mercy in our daily lives and in the truth of the Gospel so that we can proclaim it to others for your glory.

In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.


Respond

Do you ever pray using your Bible? What scriptures do you turn to as inspiration for prayer when you're feeling discouraged?

4 Ways to Connect with God When Life is Crazy

Is life feeling a little crazy right now?

You might have a newborn and be in survival mode. Perhaps you just started a new job and are trying to figure out your new routine. Maybe you’re running yourself ragged taking your kids to all their practices, performances, games, and activities.

You have too many places to be, too much stuff to do, and too many people relying on you.

And, oh yeah, try to squeeze in an hour-long quiet time in there every day, okay?

I think many of us feel that if we don’t have an hour, thirty minutes, or even fifteen minutes to devote to serious, uninterrupted “quiet time” that we shouldn’t even bother.  Somehow, we’ve gotten the idea that meaningful interactions with God can’t happen in five minutes, or even in one minute.

Why is that?

We don’t expect every interaction with our friends, spouses, or children to be rich, life-changing experiences. Even deeply intimate relationships are filled with quiet, everyday moments: gentle hugs before leaving; sweet smiles over lunch; little chats about daily life; quick snuggles before bed. These mundane, seemingly insignificant moments form the foundation for deeper interactions. 

So why do we expect our relationship with God to be different? 

Why do we expect every moment we spend with God to be lengthy, worshipful bliss? When real life just doesn’t leave room for a lengthy time of prayer and Bible study, why not let go of guilt and connect with God in small ways throughout your day? Those brief moments aren’t insignificant. In fact, I think they lay the foundation and whet your appetite for even deeper connection with God later.

When time is short and life feels out of control, you can connect with God in the midst of the craziness by filling your home with scripture, praying one sentence at a time, listening to scripture and good teaching, and listening to worshipful music. 

1// Fill Your Home with Scripture

I love buying and framing beautiful scripture printables. I have them in several rooms in our home, and I have even more pieces just waiting to be hung up. 

Displaying verses or quotes from hymns throughout your home is a great way to remind yourself of Biblical truth throughout your day. You won’t notice them every day, but you may be surprised at how they pop out at you on days when you need a little extra encouragement.

If you don’t want to bother with frames, I also have a lot of friends who write their own verses on chalkboards or whiteboards in their homes. You can even use whiteboard markers to write on mirrors, windows, or sliding glass doors! 

Whatever the medium, filling your home with Biblical encouragement is an excellent way to connect with God throughout the day.

2// Pray, One Sentence at a Time

I think many of us hear others pray in public and feel intimidated. Their lengthy prayers are eloquent and inspirational, and our own prayers seem dull and clumsy in comparison. 

Whether we’re praying aloud or silently, our prayers are not an opportunity to show off our spiritual vocabulary. (Remember the prayers of the Pharisee and the tax collector: God wants humility, not bravado!) Prayer is an opportunity for finite humans to commune with an infinite God. 

Your prayers don’t have to be long or filled with big words to bring you into God’s presence.  You can come to Him throughout your day to repent, to ask for help, or to offer praise, even if you only have a few simple sentences to offer. 

  • Thank you, Jesus, that we have enough food to eat.

  • God, thank you for the beautiful birds that visit my yard every morning.

  • Father, forgive me for being frustrated during my child’s screaming, crying meltdown at the grocery store today. 

  • Holy Spirit, thank you for giving me hope when I’m afraid.

Because of Jesus, our humble prayers will always be heard, even the short ones.

3// Listen to Scripture and Good Teaching

I think one problem many of us struggle with is that we feel like we specifically have to read (with our eyeballs) the Bible to get something out of it. Why not listen to God’s Word as well?

I know what you’re thinking: I’m a visual learner! I don’t get as much out of when I listen instead of read it!

I get it, I’m pretty visual too. But, if you actually don’t have time to read, isn’t listening to it still going to be better than doing nothing?

A little over a year ago I was in the middle of a chronological Bible read-through. As usual, I’d gotten stuck in the Old Testament, so I decided to try something different: listening to my daily “readings” while I was getting ready in the morning or while in the car.

That small change made a huge impact in my life. 

I began to look forward to that part of my morning instead of feeling guilty about it. I would listen to more than one day’s worth of my reading plan each day, just because I was enjoying it so much. When life calmed down and I had more time, I would go back and actually read and study the passage later. Listening to God’s Word a little bit at a time actually set the foundation for me to study it more deeply at other times. 

The YouVersion app makes it really easy to choose a reading plan and then listen to it on your phone. There are also fancier audio versions of the Bible that have music and sound effects. Do some research, try a few out, and figure out what you like!

After I started listening to the Bible, I also began to enjoy many different Christian podcasts. There is a lot of excellent Biblical teaching out there and it's all completely free. Listening to great teaching helps me know and love the Bible more, even when I don't have a lot of time to sit down and study a passage for myself.

There are about a dozen faith-based podcasts that I subscribe to, but my favorites are Unlocking the Bible with Colin Smith, The Gospel Coalition, and Help Me Teach the Bible with Nancy Guthrie.

4// Listen to Worshipful Music

Sometimes I want to focus on God, but the task at hand requires my full attention or my brain is fried to the point that even listening to someone talk sounds too hard.

That’s when I listen to worshipful music.

I struggle with a tendency to turn on the television just for “background noise.” I’ll turn on a show I’ve seen several times and then half-listen to it as I do something else. Now, television isn’t all bad, so I’m not planning on completely cutting it out of my life, but I’ve been making an effort to at least keep it off when I’m not actually watching it. 

Instead, I make a conscious choice to listen to music. Specifically, music that directs my thoughts to God. I have a few different playlists I’ve created for different moods, and I often enjoy listening to contemporary versions of hymns from groups like Page CXVI. If that’s not your thing, no worries! Any music that reminds you of Biblical truth will do!

- - - 

Whatever the cause, sometimes life gets overwhelming. In those times, connecting with God might seem close to impossible. Instead of feeling guilty because you can’t spend as much time in prayer or Bible study as you would like, focus on the small ways you can connect with God throughout your day. As you do, you’ll be laying the foundation for deeper connection with God later, as things calm down a bit.


Respond

How about you? When life gets crazy, how do you connect with God throughout your day?

Are You Tolerating Your Life, or Loving It?

Be honest: would you say you love your life as it is now, or do you just slog through each day, waiting for it to get better?

I’d say I’m more of a slogger. I struggle to be content with my life as it actually is. I tend to tolerate the present as I wait for that next thing that I just know will make me happier than I am now. That’s why I was ready to buy Alexandra Kuykendall’s book Loving My Actual Life pretty much as soon as I saw the title.

If that wasn’t enough of a hook, these couple thoughts from the book’s introduction reeled me in for good:

“We know with certainty that we must be made for more than merely tolerating our circumstances; we want to know how to thrive within them.”

I’m so tired of tolerating! I’m ready to thrive!

“We all have our ideal and then also all have our reality. They rarely match up. This is a book about savoring the reality.”

My ideal and my reality so do not match right now! I’m ready to savor!

The Idea Behind The Book

Loving My Actual Life: My Experiment in Relishing What's Right in Front of Me is Kuykendall’s reflection on nine months of intentional experimentation in nine different areas of her life: quiet, mornings, dates, health, adventure, home organization, creativity, meals, and passions. Each month, the author chose a few new habits or goals to implement to help her focus on that area of her life.

The Experiment

For example: in the “quiet” month, one of her goals was to have thirty minutes of intentional alone time every day. During the month where she focused on “dates”, she decided to give her face-to-face interactions with people her undivided attention, instead of allowing herself to be distracted.

Loving My Actual Life

Over the course of each month, she reflected on how she was doing with all of her goals, and what God was teaching her about Himself through it all.

Although Kuykendall’s monthly experiments involved setting goals and forming new habits, her book definitely doesn’t read like a behavior modification checklist. This is not, “Transform Yourself into the Perfect Christian Woman in Nine Short Months!”  

Instead, just as the title suggests, it’s inspiration and motivation for you to discover what is already great in the life you have right now. Goals and habits are just tools Kuykendall uses to hone her focus on the topic at hand so that she can see God working in her life at that moment. Her perspective is transformed because her experiment is essentially living intentionally with gratitude: nine areas, one month at a time. Each month, her area of focus reminds her of essential Biblical truths that bring her joy.

For example, in the “health” month, her resolution to care for her body through exercise and better sleep remind her of the miracle of Christ’s bodily incarnation:

We’re in Lent season right now, preparing to remember Christ’s body being broken. On Easter morning we will celebrate the resurrection, the overcoming of death that happens three days later. But first the body is broken. It’s what we commemorate when we take communion, representing the flesh and the blood on the cross. It is that broken body that changed the course of history, on which our entire faith hinges.

Jesus's body, a holding spot for God himself.

At the end of that month, Kuykendall’s desire for healthy living was not selfish or vain as it is for many of us. Instead, she was filled with a desire to care for her boy in order to serve and obey: to participate in “God’s good” daily.

The Results

In the end, the author’s nine-month experiment was a mixture of successes and failures. Some of the habits she tried out worked for her, and some of them were complete non-starters. I loved her Gospel-infused reflection at the end of the book on her “failures” in the experiments:

“When i failed at an experiment, did God love me any less? No. His character, his essence, do not change. I can’t move his position toward me. So in a sense those failures not only taught me about my own wiring, they reminded me of what I already knew of his, that his grace covers every area of my life. I, in fact, do not need to perform for him.” Love that!

My Take

After reading the book, I don’t think I really need to dive into nine months of major experimentation myself. It’s not because I’m too awesome or anything, but because of the excellence of Kuykendall’s writing. It was very personable and relatable, with solid Biblical encouragement. She artfully introduced me to her family and friends so I could walk into her life and live her experiments with her. She is inspiring me to make a few small, practical changes in my life like she did, but mostly they’re changes that will remind me of what her book already taught me:

  • To make time for stillness

  • To be fully present with the people I love

  • To use my body to serve God

  • To allow God to do the unexpected in my life, even when it’s inconvenient

  • To embrace the role God has uniquely designed for me in his story right now, today

If you, like me, struggle with contentment, this is definitely a book you won’t regret picking up!


Respond

How do you fight the urge to simply tolerate your life?